Thursday, July 14, 2005

What kind of a man are you?




Are you a family man, a playboy, a scoundrel, an upstart, a predator or a just plain ordinary Joe? The kind of man you are today determines the happiness of others who live under the same roof as you.
If you are the type who goes to work, returns home when the day is over and takes the family out during weekends, then you are a family man. Some may call you boring but "boring men" like you are in high demand by ordinary women.
Most women rather have a family man than a cad who is totally undependable, unreliable and untrustworthy - no matter how good-looking he is. The world is full of family men. Not all are in the same category. There are men who behave like family men but lead double lives.
Men who live double lives tend to get found out in the end. The end result is not pretty.
A scoundrel is said to be one who cares only for himself. He comes first all the time. He doesn't care who knows about it, and he doesn't want to know. Strangely, some women find this kind of man attractive. They put the attraction down to "mysterious, moody and unpredictable". If that is the case, chances are that these women prefer rogues.
But we shan't talk about these women and their self-persecution instincts.
Playboys we all know. They play the field. Some of them have what it takes to be a playboy. They have the looks, money, cars, style and manners to sweep most women off their feet.
Playboys usually start young - from school. As they progress in life, they become more suave, dapper and sophisticated. Needless to say, most men envy them but do not have the attributes to join the club nor the courage to "love them and lose them".
Playboys are usually heartless. They may have a little conscience but they suppress it all the time. They avoid the incidence of tears. Bad for business, they say. And in the wake of their activity, playboys usually leave a trail of broken hearts.
In their twilight years, they dwell unhealthily on their past activities and reminise about their golden years. In a way, they are still immature. There are some like that, but not many. You will be surprised to learn that playboys can make very good husbands, that is after they have realised the foolishness of their ways.
A predator is the most dangerous of them all. Sometimes they don't look the role. They can have baby faces and gentle demeanor. But their sole mission in life is to look for the innocent girls, break their hearts and leave.
A predator deliberately goes out to make as many women as possible miserable. They see, they conquer, they destroy lives. They have a psychological scar which they cannot cure themselves and so they seek solace in bringing misery to women.
Sometimes, they take women's money and leave them scarred for life. Not many women can spot a predator. Some women's instinct is stronger than others. Those whose intuition are in fine condition save themselves. Others who are not so wise allow themselves to be used and abused.
Then there is a category of man which is quite rare. These are the ones who only bring joy to women. They are kind, compassionate and gentle. Most women think this kind of man does not exist. But they do, except they do not belong to you (women), or usually they don't.
Women who are extremely lucky or had done something good in their childhood or in their previous lives (as mentioned by Julie Andrews in the Sound of Music) will marry men like that.
I suspect men of this make are spiritualists or great teachers in their previous lives. They may even be saints. It is decided before-hand(though not on the earthly plain) who they would marry (you are allowed not to believe this) in this life.
Generally, most men are not rascals even though a lot of women would disagree. Some men are weak, so are some women. Some men are wicked, so are some women. Some men are immoral, well, so are some women.
The bottom line is men, like women, have faults. Whether they remain in a weakened state sometimes depends on their life partners. Spouses can change their mates for the better. I have seen at least one or two cases. So women can effect a positive change on some men who need to be changed.
Ultimately, all men can change for the better or be very good husbands, fathers, brothers, leaders, priests, etc. The choice is always theirs. It has been so since time immemorial.

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